Bloodless Coup

Laws and Bushes

No, not those Bushes, or these bushes, but the kind of bush for which one might use this coupon.

From Feministing, a link to this story about legislation in Missouri to prevent underage waxing. The idea is that if you are underage, getting a bikini wax requires parental consent. That's right, if a teen wants to go cue-ball bald from shaving in the privacy of her own home, that's perfectly fine, but if she wants to avoid razor stubble and go to the salon or spa for a wax she needs parental consent.

From the Riverfront Times:

Tucked within Missouri Senate Bill 280, now awaiting Governor Matt Blunt's signature, is a single sentence that's sure to have repercussions at poolside chaises and in steamy backseats across the state: "The written informed consent of a minor's parent or legal guardian... must be obtained prior to providing body waxing on or near the genitalia."

If Blunt signs the bill -- which he's fully expected to do -- budding bikini-wearers interested in ripping the pubic hair from their nether-regions will have to convince Mom or Dad to sign off.

"That's so a child under the age of eighteen can’t go in and do a complete Brazilian wax without parental consent,” explains Darla Fox, executive director of the Missouri State Board of Cosmetology, which proposed the law.

“Twelve- and thirteen-year-old little girls think they’re eighteen and nineteen in this day and age,” Fox continues. “Sometimes they can become very rebellious, and if they think this is something that their folks can come unglued about, that’s what they’re going to do.”

Huh! Who knew that Missouri had an epidemic of 12 and 13 year old girls getting bikini waxes. Or that it was such a distressing problem it required legislative action!

The hair-removal method, “the barest form of erotic shaving,” gained prominence in the mid-’90s as skimpy thongs made their way into wardrobes. Rather than simply trim the hair escaping from the cloth triangle, women (and men) started paying to have it waxed off. The added bonus is increased sensitivity. And, in a culture where some teens don’t consider oral sex to be sex at all, a good waxing can double the pleasure.

“We use a wax substance specifically made for [Brazilian waxing],” says Chris Duello, marketing director for The Face & The Body, a Clayton day spa that offers the procedure for $60. “It tends to be very sticky. The wax is applied carefully where you want to remove the hair, and then a piece of cloth, usually a muslin, is applied to that, and it’s smoothed in the direction of the hair growth.”

With one stern rip and a few days of healing, the pubic area and butt crack are as fresh as the morning dew and remain so for a couple of months.

And this section - and no, I'm not even going to comment on the turn of phrase "a butt crack...as fresh as the morning dew" - the implication is made that bikini waxing is somehow contributing to promiscuity. While late in the piece body builders are mentioned (in the past tense) and the language of the bill specifies "minors" without reference to gender, clearly this bill is about controlling young women's bodies. There is no mention of being skeeved out by a 15 year old boy wearing a banana hammock. Nuh-uh. It's "little girls." Little girls. Like those high school cheerleaders the football fellahs like to watch wearing the little skirts that probably require a significant amount of hair removal. Uh-huh. It is maddening to me not only that time is wasted on legislation like this - that if you read carefully, the market is already pretty much taking care of - but that the targets of this sort of thing are young women. What next? Don't cut any of your hair because it's unseemly? No pants, because it might show your girl parts?

And no, I am not immune to the concern that competition and the pervasive view of women as sexual objects puts a great deal of pressure on women - especially young women - to emphasize their sexuality over their strength, their intelligence or their creativity. Should twelve year olds try to be Carrie from Sex and the City? Most of us probably agree they should not. Yet I can't help thinking that the worry over the bikini wax - without any data to prove its negative consequences - rings a little bit too much of trouble with a capital T that rhymes with B that stands for Bikini.

Look, I used to live in a city where every woman who had pubic hair waxed the heck out of it, from teens to pregnant women to grandmas. And they did it because they all wore a variation of this. Rio de Janeiro, for all its body obsession and plastic surgery, was in practice a very democratic place in terms of the actual use of small bathing suits. And let me tell you, it worked for the guys too, where you would see both tight young abs and big beer bellies hanging over the sungas of the men. One year, there was even a fashion statement that women made with their bikinis, holding back on the waxing. It was called the bigodinho or "little mustache" (I'll let you figure it out, but think in terms of the Black Crowes album cover that got spiked). You think that if that was the fashion here among teenage girls it would be any more popular with those who want to regulate young women's bodies?

As Feministe points out, even supporters of personal choices in young women's lives can see that there are complexities here:

Yet it still presents an interesting predicament: While I ardently believe in personal autonomy, at the same time, the idea of thirteen-year-olds waxing off their shrubbery when they've barely taken the damn thing out for a spin gives me the willies.

Yet this is one more example of how our political system reinforces the message to women that they cannot be trusted to make decisions for themselves - even trivial decisions about body hair. In combination with the message of objectification, what are we telling them? No waxes when you're young, but you know, all the guys like it when you're of age and don't forget to get your ass bleached too while you're at it. Until a certain age you're no good if you're not pure and unthinking, and after that age you're no good if you're not a sexual object (and are unthinking). Where does it end?

Posted by binky at July 18, 2005 03:08 PM | TrackBack | Posted to Politics