My damn cat stole a raw steak off a plate (next to the stove) last night. I first knew something was amiss when I saw him streaking by me (head down from the weight of the steak). I start yelling and screaming (I had no idea at this point what he had done, but given his finky behavior I knew he had done something, thus the pre-emptive screaming and yelling), and lit off after him. He ejected a piece of it (to distract me, I'm convinced) and took off upstairs. I ignored his distraction (it wasn't a big enough piece) and finally tracked him down under the futon. I pulled him out by the last inch of his tail; he was making horrible growling and yowling noises. Since I'm bigger than he is, I took the steak away from him.
Yes, I cooked and ate it anyway. I ate it in front of him just to show him I remained stronger than he.
Bastard.
Posted by baltar at November 3, 2007 03:52 PM | TrackBack | Posted to Culture | Food | Homeland Insecurity | Random Thoughts | War | You Can't Make This Stuff UpI have two words for you: opposable thumbs.
Posted by: binky at November 3, 2007 09:09 PM | PERMALINKis this the cat that has tried to kill me or another one. if it's the one who tried to kill me, i hope you dangled forkful after forkful just out of reach to torment him.
great monday morning image, any cat dragging a steak to the shelter of a futon. thanks for the giggle.
Posted by: moon at November 5, 2007 09:43 AM | PERMALINKCourtesy of videosift, another feisty food-obsessed feline.
Posted by: binky at November 7, 2007 06:17 PM | PERMALINKYou ATE the steak. Didn't your mother teach you anything? your friend, Jane
Posted by: jane hauser at November 26, 2007 03:47 PM | PERMALINKHey, I cooked it. That should have killed whatever cat-germs existed in it. Besides, I didn't want to let the cat win - not eating the steak means he wins.
Posted by: baltar at November 26, 2007 04:11 PM | PERMALINKYou DID duct-tape the cat to a piece of furniture juuuuust out of reach of the steak while you ate, didn't you?
Posted by: jacflash at November 26, 2007 10:16 PM | PERMALINKNo. I just let him hop around and make "meowing" noises while I fed the dogs the scraps. That was moderately entertaining.
The cat in question never attempted to run off with the turkey (18 lbs uncooked); maybe he's learned his lesson.
Posted by: baltar at November 26, 2007 10:37 PM | PERMALINKJane, his mother taught him plenty. He just hung around with the wrong crowd when he was in high school.
Posted by: jacflash at November 27, 2007 11:54 AM | PERMALINKthanks, jacflash, that comment gave his mother a good laff.
Posted by: jane hauser at November 27, 2007 01:22 PM | PERMALINKAha, your beast is not the only one with large aspirations.
Posted by: binky at February 27, 2008 08:17 PM | PERMALINK