May 14, 2009

"Coal is West Virginia"

I have no idea what the point of this West Virginia Public Radio story on the "Battle of Ringtones" was meant to convey. The story had a very pro-coal vibe to it (the only ringtones discussed were pro-coal ones; none by anti-mountain-top removal were mentioned). It seemed more like a commercial than an actual news story.

And then they played the ringtones. Oh. My. God.

I can't embed them; but go here and listen to them. Really. Seriously. Go and listen. I'll wait.

As the story notes, these ringtones were made from songs commissioned by the West Virginia Coal Association in the 1980s. They don't sound like 1980s music; at best, very bad 1960s pop, and possibly even earlier. Schmaltzy crappy music to the Nth degree. Really: go and listen. You'll pee your pants.

(For those that still haven't clicked through to listen, here is a parody video made by the Sierra Club that makes fun of the awfulness of the songs, and (heavy-handedly) argues that the future of West Virginia is clean "green" energy. Ignore the Sierra Club propaganda and listen to the music:)

Now: the really funny part. As the WV Public Radio story notes, you can play the ringtones at the WV Coal Association website, but you can't actually use them as ringtones. No one can figure out how. The tech-savvy (sarcasm) WV Coal Association has prevented piracy of their ringtones (more sarcasm) by making them undownloadable. This is clearly effective at preventing unauthorized use (OOPS: except for the Sierra Club! Tricky eco-veggitarian bastards!) (Note: that was more sarcasm), but somewhat ineffective at spreading the "Coal is West Virginia" message every time someones cell phone goes off.

So, my operating theory at this point is that someone at West Virginia Public radio is pro-environment, and wanted to make fun of the idiot coal association, so drafted what is essentially a fake story that sounds pro-coal at first listen, but is really anti-coal because it makes them look like idiots. Nothing else can explain that radio story. No one younger than 40 can listen to that awful "Coal is West Virginia" crappy music and think highly of the brain trust (note: last bit of sarcasm) that thought making those ringtones would promote coal in West Virginia.

Clearly, they need some new PR people working the pro-coal position here.

Posted by baltar at May 14, 2009 11:30 AM | TrackBack | Posted to Clean Coal, My Ass | Corporate Bullshit | General Stupidity | Media | Music

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